I have fear, fear does not have me

I came across this line that sort of crept into my mind & ever since then, it’s stuck with me - “let your fears make you fierce”. For about a month I’ve had that line on repeat over & over again, all the way up until the other morning. Then it got more clear & I thought that I want to have my fears, but I don’t want to allow my fears to have me.

When I say that I have fear & fear does not have me, I’m saying that whether it’s fear, loyalty, being honest, or any other quality or characteristic, we want to be able to utilize those qualities & characteristics, rather than those qualities & characteristics dictate to us what we should do.

Having said that, I was always taught never to take an action when I realized that my head was up my ass (when I was in a survival or fearful state). What I realized on the deepest level was that I could make a decision to do something, even though I was terrified, if!! I was consciously aware of it & decided to act anyway.

Let’s be clear, one cannot get to this point unless they’ve first acknowledged that they were scared or fearful. This first step is key & easier said than done & this is why.

In healing, often times, concepts, realizations & coaching can take a long time to integrate into our bodies. Meaning, because of unconsciousness, disconnection, fear, shame or trauma, sometimes it takes us awhile to really get something to go from just words in our heads & have it drop deep into our bodies; this is where it goes from being a cognitive understanding to emotionally getting it on a visceral level ... & that’s where the transformation takes place.

For many reasons, relating to the Corona virus or other things in our lives, we’re disconnected & even have shame to admit that we’re fearful, scared or even terrified. We find ways to rationalize our feelings away, avoiding all kinds of opportunities & situations never fully realizing that the reason why we avoid these moments is because we’re scared & it’s too difficult for us to acknowledge & admit it for some reason.

When you start to slow down & realize that you have shame about admitting something you’re fearful about, you start to have the ability & option to decide whether you’re going to allow fear to have you or you’re going to have fear & choose to take action any way.