So this is 50

I recently wrote about some myths of being in your 40’s, & it inspired me to share about how I feel to be 50.

It might sound weird, but a mission that I’ve adopted is to "celebrate the life I didn’t expect." That probably should be a general slogan for being in your 50’s: most of us have probably uttered to themselves at some point that they’re surprised about how an aspect of their lives turned out the way it did. This could include being divorced & never thinking you would be; living in an unexpected city; doing a certain thing for a living; dealing with particular personal issues, & repeating behaviors of your parents; a health issue you never thought you’d have to deal with, etc, etc.

For me, it’s more than a general theme, because of my strong & somewhat “stubborn” tendency toward holding to a vision I had for my life.

For years, I thought I was going to be an older father, following in the footsteps of a mentor of mine. I held strong to this vision until my wife, Lindsay came along & “messed” that plan up in the best way.

So far as I can tell, being in your 50’s could probably go a couple of ways:

One, is taking the path of least resistance, whereby you never really tackle demons & issues along the way. All the while, you'll be stacking up resentments & saying how life cheated you & didn’t turn out the way you would have hoped it to be.

The other being the road less traveled, where you learn from your mistakes & continue to gain insight along your way. On this path you continue to take note of familial issues you’ve inherited, many behaviors & dysfunctional patterns about yourself as you continue to learn from them & course correct.

A big key of being content in your 50’s is in knowing where you’ve been a victim in your past versus how you act like a victim in your present, but aren’t one. You must do the necessary work to stop blaming your parents for what they did to you or didn’t provide, regardless of how deplorable.

"It’s never too late to be what you might have been," should also be a motto adopted by anyone over 50, because it’s true.

It’s never to late to do a lot of things:
To get married again.
To right some wrongs.
To start again.
To change careers.
To heal certain issues.
To transform your marriage.
To be a better parent.

I don’t know what the solution is for a better world these days, but figuring your own issues out is a good start.

“Be the change you want to see in the world.”